When Jay Z’s Big Pimpin’ plays, does Beyonce look like this
When she hears this part of the song?
Or maybe like this?
Or like this
One of these. At least. Maybe all of ‘em. I would.
It makes me glad Sean Carter isn’t clairvoyant.
Instead of basking in the afterglow of starring in the best Super Bowl halftime show we have seen in years, Beyonce is employing a publicist who chasing down media outlets who deign to run screenshots of her performance deemed unflattering.
If I looked like this, it’s all I’d care about.
On Monday, our pals at Buzzfeed assembled an incoherent list of 33 Beyoncé pictures and GIFs taken from her Super Bowl performance, and posted it under the title “The 33 Fiercest Moments From Beyoncé’s Halftime Show.”
On Tuesday, they received an email from Beyoncé’s publicist (“head worker bey”), politely asking them to DESTROY ALL UNFLATTERING PHOTOS OF BEYONCÉ IN EXISTENCE.
“Thanks for taking my call. As discussed, there are some unflattering photos on your current feed that we are respectfully asking you to change. I am certain that you will be able to find some better photos.
The worst are #5, 6, 10, 11, 12, 19 and 22.
Thank you very much.
If I were Buzzfeed, I’d have responded with an email comprised of nothing but John Mayer guitar faces.
Feel better Yvette?