No, not at all.

I am in the first stage of patch testing.

They are looking at 117 potential irritants in an attempt to determine what’s freaking my body out. I felt self-conscious and asked “is 117 a lot?” The nurse said 80 (or is it 88) represents the base number of patches and that my “extras” are for drug reactions, something that has been an issue for me.

I’m really, really itchy and my back is on fire.

The patches come off Wednesday in another appointment. My final appointment is Friday. Then I will be scratching the hell out of my back. And maybe drinking.