Hometown Tinder is a Don’t

When I went home to Scranton for Thanksgiving, I learned a hard lesson.

It was late at night and I was lying in the black lacquer bed (like this, but the headboard is round. Seriously.) I picked out when I was twelve or thirteen. I didn’t open Tinder looking for love. Nay, I figured that Tinderers of Scranton would provide fine fodder for Why Did You Put That on Tinder??

Tumblr wedding

Yeah, I’m cruel like that.

Instead, after five or six swipes left, I was faced with something terrible: a man with whom I shared 73 Facebook friends. Yep, someone from my high school.

Naturally this wasn’t a recently-divorced, still-hot former football star valedictorian. No. This was a dude with a mustache who used to skip classes to smoke outside the gym. That guy.

[Another friend who shall remain nameless was given her brother as a match. Ew. Ew! No!]

Learn from my mistake: hide yourself on Tinder before going to your hometown. Change your Discovery Preferences. Just do it. Do it now.


10 thoughts on “Hometown Tinder is a Don’t

  1. Pingback: You Won’t Believe That These People Are Using Tinder! « ShareTu.com

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